So am I socially retarted? Part 1

What about their social life was (and still is) the number one concern from people who found out that my mom was home schooling. My mother at least never let on that that was any concern from her. But I am sure some people may wonder what the home-schooled child thinks about that. Or at least what one home-schooled child thinks about it.

When I left school in the first grade I did not have any friends. For what ever reason I was a social out cast. I don't blame that on anyone, I believe that it was largely due to my personality and partly due to biology (my dad has aspergers and I believe i have aspergers tendencies). I was not comfortable engaging my peers in conversation, I just hoped someone would come talk to me. It may be that a child with problems such as mine confronted with this situation day, after day, after day would eventually over come and make friends. But since that didn't happen we will never know.

Most of my childhood I only had two friends, my best friend and cousin Brindie, and my good friend Jaclyn. These two were the truest friends, never judgmental and always loving. However Brindie always lived an hour or more away, and Jaclyn was in and out of my life (more about her in later posts). So for the most part I played by myself. I did have siblings there are six of us total, but as they will lovingly attest to, I was in my own world for most of the time.

At Lagoon with Brindie

I was quite aware of the fact that I didn't have any friend, even the girls at the church I attended shunned me as a loner. While at times that bothered me, like when I was the only one not invited to a party, for the most part I could have cared less. That is until I hit preteen.

Preteen is the most awful age to start wanting friends. Simply because kids at that age are not very nice. But preteen is exactly the age that most home-school children realize they want friends and that the most likely way to get those friends is at school. So when I was 11, I signed up for 7th grade, at least part time.

I enrolled in Dance and Drama, also wanting to see if I was up to speed with my peers, in pre-algebra, and English. This year was wrought with "social experiences" I experienced name calling, kids making out in the hall, proper bus etiquette, and how to respond to teachers. (I did not incorporate these into my life). I am making this sound all bad and I did make a few friends, but the reality is that all of these acts were all seen as appropriate social behavior. Having grown up in a Christian home I knew this not to be true.

well it is late and this post is getting really long and I am teaching "Joy School" in the morning so I will continue this train of thought in another post tomorrow.